Comrade Jacob
Comrade Jacob,
My people are loyally defending me with their lives against the cockroaches supported by the infidels. Do not be down-hearted, we shall triumph. Africa and it’s true leaders shall triumph, Comrade Bob too confirmed this when he called me just now!
In your last letter of support you asked me of the steps to be taken to ensure 42 years of rule.
What I would first advise is support all those whom you can most trust; allow them to eat well of the public purse and gorge themselves on Government contracts. When they have eaten their fill remind them that they have done so at your behest and because of your largesse and patronage; throw one, preferably one of the younger ones most closely associated to the bling “Breitling” lifestyle to the tender mercies of the courts,for, as the French say, “pour encourager les autres”, or to “encourage” the rest.
Toll the roads; make the people pay for your palaces, excesses and lifestyle. They will of course bitch and moan and you may have to shoot a few, but they need to get to work and they will succumb.
And pick the dumbest to head the Constitutional Court; dumb and mute can easiest be moulded to your own agenda.
Ensure that every public building and space throughout the land contain a picture of yourself, from an earlier glorious age when you were fit and virile and underline this virility by taking a new wife at intervals of no more than one year and sire more children than there are grains of sand in the desert.
Never listen to wise counsel; trust only those whose opinions have been bought; the people will always be with you.
I must close now, Comrade Jacob, I hear gunfire in the streets and the sound of happy, joyous people in the streets. We must finally have crushed those few rats who opposed me.
I must go and celebrate with my sons; kill the fatted calf, take a few virgins and plot my vengeance on the rats.
As the sun rises on Tripoli the people are as one; celebrating the end of 42 years of torture, reprisals, self-glorification and enrichment. Gadhaffi’s sons have been arrested, and there is no sign of Ghaddaffi himself. The World wonders where he has slunk off to and half expect him to emerge in South Africa.